My Journey from Discovery to Acceptance to Change
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Hope Through Authenticity

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July 6, 2020
My Mouth and My Brain

“The words fell out of my mouth without my brain straining a muscle.” I wrote the above sentence when one my characters said something mean and nasty and f*cking hilarious. My writing friend, that wonderful technicality wizard, struck the line from the manuscript. She said, “Words cannot form without the brain first engaging.” Technically, I […]

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June 8, 2020
Disappointed [fill in the blank]

I don’t have many triggers* but the word ‘disappointment’ makes my heart pound with anxiety. My father told me several times I was a disappointment. He told me he could never be proud or brag about me because whenever he did, I turned around an embarrassed him. So, being a disappointment is a deep wound […]

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April 27, 2020
What Is Forgiveness?

A few weeks ago, I posted a blog about Grudge Holding. A great friend [let’s call her Amy], who is always so supportive, responded to me via email. With her permission, I wanted to share some sections. “I think holding grudges is tied to my tendency to not forgive, and sometimes I wish I could […]

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March 30, 2020
Annoyance or Abiding Insult: Grudge Part 2

Recently I wrote a blog where I admitted to holding a grudge for two people in my life. Yesterday, while listening to Golden In Death by JD Robb, one of the characters said: “What’s a momentary annoyance for one is a deep abiding insult to another.” I’m left wondering if the two people I begrudge […]

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March 16, 2020
The Grudge

In my last post, Tit-for-Tat, I wrote this sentence: “I defaulted to my pattern:  Avoid conflict -- hold a grudge that I pretend I don’t hold -- eventually run away from the relationship.” When I wrote that sentence, the word ‘grudge’ seemed to glow and accuse. According to the dictionary, grudge is a “feeling of […]

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March 2, 2020
Tit-For-Tat: Bad Me or Human Nature?

Have you ever discovered something about yourself that you would have sworn wasn’t true? Or has someone ever shown you something about yourself that you denied until the evidence was clear? This happened to me two weeks ago and I, quite frankly, still haven’t decided how I feel about it. Am I a “bad” friend […]

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November 26, 2019
Is There Something Wrong With Me?

Recently, someone I knew very well passed away. She was 51 and the death was a shock to all. I had not seen this person in almost 5 years. We didn’t have a falling out. We just moved in different circles and then I literally moved away. Her passing was sad. I was particularly sad […]

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November 4, 2019
A Friend's Kindness Freaked Me Out

If you read my blog regularly then you know I lost both my parents inside of 6 weeks. You may also know that after my breakdown (April 2012), I lost most of my friends (all but 2). I have been lucky enough to create new relationships. Wonderful women. Accepting of my idiosyncrasies. The Godiverse has […]

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October 14, 2019
What My Parents Taught Me

Both of my parents died within 2 months of each other. So, I wanted to honor them by telling you what they taught me. Some of these lessons are great. Some are awful. But, they are what they are. And I wanted to honor ME by being honest about words spoken that haunt me still. […]

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July 1, 2019
I Will Not Be My Mother: Or Am I Already?

As I write this, my mother is living in a rehab center after a fall and a hospital stay. This is at least the sixth time we’ve done the rehab thing. She is bored there. She is lonely there. I get that. It’s not a great place to be. But the kids, myself included, cannot […]

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  • Meet June

    June with Purple Hair

    In April 2012 I had a mental breakdown. The real thing. I have about 36 hours that I don’t remember....

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  • All of my novels, at least so far, have an element of mental illness within a character.  Decide to Hope is the most autobiographical in that I struggle in many ways exactly as the female protagonist. 
    - J.C.
  • cover Decide to Hope by June A. Converse - woman walking on the beach

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