My Journey from Discovery to Acceptance to Change
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Hope Through Authenticity

December 31, 2017
When Nothing Works

This wave of despair started on Friday, December 1.  Today is December 31 and I have tried everything I know to alleviate the darkness.  I’ll dig out a few feet and then sink  deeper.  I’m pushing through my third wave of suicidal and self-harm thoughts and plans.  So alone.  So scared.  No one to talk […]

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November 27, 2017
Am I Stronger?

As I often do, I told a new acquaintance about my mental breakdown.  I don’t do this with everyone – only with people who I think may make a good friend, or who seem to “need it”, or maybe I tell because I want to excuse my erratic behavior.  This woman asked me if I […]

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November 6, 2017
Suicide from the Inside

This will be the hardest piece I’ve ever written -- it is the piece I never wanted to write.  It is the piece I’m scared will destroy me.  But, it must be written as it is important and in some ways, eating me alive.  I am not a therapist.  I have no statistical studies for […]

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October 23, 2017
Going To the Dogs?

Do me a favor – take a few deep breaths, get as calm as you possibly can.  Get a sense of how hard your heart is beating and any other body sensations you can identify.  Got it?  Now I want you to think about a time you’ve been extremely angry or frightened. Remember the circumstances, […]

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August 28, 2017
Wanna See What Excess Emotional Energy Looks Like ... The Post That Never Happened

The Goal that Must Be Realized When Habits Stop Being Habits, Part 3 Over the last two posts, I’ve worried over good habits that just don’t stick.  One thing I realized is that I had some habits that I don’t need right now.  For example, in the last post, I analyzed the goal of eliminating […]

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June 12, 2017
Negative Nelly Gets to Talk

Does your brain ever send you negative messages?  I’m not talking about the Inner Critic.  The Inner Critic likes to beat you up for being you.  The Negative Brain just likes to whine about what is.  For example, the Negative Brain may say, “This day sucks.”  The Inner Critic says “this day sucks because you […]

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June 5, 2017
The Dragons Inside Us

"I wasted so much time being other people.  But I’m good enough just being me." Kelly Osbourne interview on Good Morning America on 4/25/2017 How Many Personalities Do I Have? Think about you … the ways you behave, think, interact.  How many personalities do you have?  For example, how to you act when you are […]

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May 29, 2017
What Does an Extreme Emotion Feel Like?

Some people, like my husband, live in a more rational world.  He rarely, if ever, feels an out-of-control emotion.  He gets angry, sad, scared – but he never feels out-of-control.  When an emotion hits me in that powerful way, he’ll often look at me as if I’m an alien.  My kids actually used to say […]

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May 8, 2017
Recipes for Emotional Safety: Tangible Ideas to Your Next Best Decision

What happens if you let a pot of rice boil too fast? What happens if a sweet potato drips onto your oven rack? What if the oil in the pan gets too hot? Over-boiling rice makes a mess of the stove and the pot. It becomes a ruined meal. Dripping sweet potato smells great at […]

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May 1, 2017
Am I Mentally Ill?

I’m not ashamed to be depressed, manic or a binge eater.  I’m not even embarrassed to be called “mentally ill.”  But, I don’t think that label explains or helps or opens communication. What Does Mentally Ill Even Mean? I’ve been struggling for a long time with labels.  Are they helpful or harmful?  Accurate or just […]

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  • Meet June

    June with Purple Hair

    In April 2012 I had a mental breakdown. The real thing. I have about 36 hours that I don’t remember....

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  • All of my novels, at least so far, have an element of mental illness within a character.  Decide to Hope is the most autobiographical in that I struggle in many ways exactly as the female protagonist. 
    - J.C.
  • Decide to Hope Cover: Woman walking along the beach at sunset - Decide to Hope cover by June A. Converse

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